Shop Closure Historian T-Shirts

'I remember when this was all shops!...'

"So many take-overs and mergers, nobody remembers who he was."

Golden parachutes inc. - 'Our pleas for bail-out funds were ignored.'

Ye Old Cafe: No Coffee Today - Sore Arm!

Kentucky Fried Horse

"We're still the same, great company we've always been, only we've ceased to exist."

Sales

Line on graph goes right through floor.

'We're e-bankrupt.'

Small Businesses Go Under.

"Mr. Joyner, while you were out, your carefully constructed financial empire collapsed like a house of cards."

"Can I dress business casual even though I lost our business?"

Bookshop: Closed, Coming Soon Here Internet Cafe.

"Ooh look, the high street's evolved to survive!"

Mom & Pop General Store - Going Out of Business Slowly But Surely

"According to the most recent report, we have no recourse but to abandon ship."

Bootmaker upset over the death of a long term customer

'Business is very good. We'll soon be moving to smaller premises.'

Theater Owner Who Refused To Convert To Digital Projection.

'I warned you we'd get thrown out, changing the name from the Garden of Eden.'

Grand Opening and Closing Down Sale simultaneously occurring.

'I've put the business up for sale.'

Rats Flea a Sinking Ship

"I lost everything-the business, the house, the landscape."

'Your call would have been important to us before we went out of business.'

'Does that mean things are getting better or worse?'

Factory closed. The 1st CEO got most of it, as a bonus, when we fired him. Ditto, the 2nd CEO, and the last CEO got what was left.

In case of insolvency break glass.

Smoking Cessation Clinic - Formerly The Pub.

Bitch-Slapped-By-The-Invisible-Hand-Of-The-Marketplace Sale

Sale! Going Out of Monkey Business

'At least they offered us a severance gift card.'

'Tell the staff the company has hit a symbolic iceberg and is slowly sinking.'