Sex Education Talk Pillows

'Of course he didn't believe the stork story. Try telling him we made him with a 3D printer.'

"Dad want's to talk about the birds and the bees/ I guess I'll have to tell him about girls."

'Son, it's time we had a little talk about the Byrds and the Beatles.'

"Your mother and I think it's time we had a little talk about your relationship."

"Where's your phone, Johnny? I'm texting you about the birds and the bees."

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

'You know they've reached puberty when they're more interested in Dr. Ruth than Babe Ruth.'

"It says here that humans are the only member of the animal kingdom who can have sex any time, any place."

'If we respect each other, contraception makes sense!'

Sex Education

The sperm and the egg: romance in action

"We're going to start with the birds and the bees and then work our way up to the new reproductive technologies."

"I don't really know much about safe sex. I skipped the fourth grade."

'What's oriole sex'

'My mom just explained babies to me. I'm not sure, but I think I'm a bird and you're a bee.'

"This 'birds and bees' stuff,' Dad - Has it been fact-checked?"

"Oh yes, the stags fight and prance around to impress us, but in the end, we decide who we mate with: we have the power!"

"It was time you learned."

"Dad, where did I come from? The stork?"

The future Mario Andretti about to be conceived

"You are here."

'Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?'

'I'm just waiting to see when I will be preoccupied with sex.'

"Buddy, no! Remember what they taught us in sex ed!" "Don't care."

'I believe the word you want is condom, not condemn ... unless you plan on having very unsafe sex.'

'I have a question...am I a bird or a bee?'

The Joy of Sioux

"The vampire can come... I'm prepared!"

AIDS prevention

'What sexual position produces the ugliest kids?. . . Ask your mum.'

Sex Education: "Here's one we prepared earlier..."

"I know all about the birds and bees, but what's all this about 'erectile dysfunction?'"

"Well then, can I at least call you sometime?"

"All I know is this sounds like the kind of thing that could get a political appointee in trouble."

'It's probably a hormonal thing.'