Service Satire Admirer T-Shirts

"Potatoes too salty? Look, buster ??" I told you to enjoy your meal!"

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

UK border controls relaxed.

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

How about going easy on the carbs

'Marsha, did you file the Peterson account on the cumulus, stratus, cirrus, or nimbus cloud?'

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

'Hi - I'm your company perk !'

Denmark scrapped anti-blasphemy law!

Czarcasm

'Ah Mr Bond, I haven't been expecting you...'

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

"A haand gel...!?"

'It's not much of a soap opera with just that Adam guy.'

"I've heard great things about your church. Thought I would visit and say keep up the good work."

"Doctor - at home I get this nagging pain... what do you recommend?"

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

Hot cross buns

'Why thankyou! ... and I've got one for you!'

"And yet methinks, Martha, that 'Ibsen with Rhythm' seems somehow to miss the point of Ibsen."

"Well, that was the weirdest tribute band I've ever seen."

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

'And remember team, if you can't join 'em, lick 'em!'

'I'm the CEO of a large corporation. Of course my cough is productive. Everything I do is productive.'

"The only reason I'm firing you for your suggestion is because you signed yours."

'During the heart-transplant, since it was your birthday, I went ahead and added two more inches, no charge.'

'As you can see global climate change has encouraged some species to adapt to new environments.'

A Gated Community.

''Tree of Knowledge,' eh? - Has it been fact-checked?'

'This snuff video you sold me just shows people taking snuff.'

Football heads...

'Hey! You're not for real, are you man?'

"Do you have anything by The Damned."

'Day two at the...brain transplant institute.'