Sermon Sleuth Prints

Bored-again Christians.

He wasn't talking about baseball, Ernie ... He said "in the beginning", no "In the Big Inning".

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

Squeezing the Free Press.

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

"He's the chief watchdog, who watches over all the other watchdogs—but this must be his night off."

$1: Family Secrets

"Today, I'll be cherry-picking from Deuteronomy."

"We should start a church where we only read the parts of the bible that are never read in church."

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

"I see you're back from church. What was cherry-picked for you today?"

'There's too much corruption in the third world.'

'Can we sit in the balcony today? Huh? Can we?'

Money laundering - shows money flowing out of US vault.

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

"Any distinguishing 'PARSONAL' characteristics?"

"He was furiously reading the Bible before he died." "Looking for loopholes."

"So finally, the liarbird flew off to the lucrative world of tell-all books, management consultancy and after-dinner speaking..."

JET (Part I)

"I don't feel like going to school. Isn't that a flu-like symptom?"

"I made a list of all my symptoms. Lost the list. Can't remember any of my symptoms now."

'Looks like the victim was trying to tell us something,'

By the year 2500, 1 in 10 academics will devote their entire career to divining the meaning of the word 'sussudio'.

"Grammar-police, sir, we have some questions about your online posts and the inappropriate use of apostrophes."

"Ok, you were right – dogs can see ghosts."

"I sympathize with how important it is to you, John... but I simply can't bless your lure!"

SERMONS 'R' US - everything for the clergy.

'Great sermon, Reverend! Too bad my husband couldn't stay awake to hear it.'

The Robert Mueller Rosetta Stone

'How come the rabbit didn't have good luck with the foot?'

Spy Satellite

Credulity, Superstition and Fanaticism.

"...I have the oddest 'earliest memory' and I wanted to share it. It's just as wekkm I guess. Knowing some man secretly attended my first birthday party has caused me to question my parentage all these years....Especially since Mother Park made me promise not to tell Father that the potted plant was acually J. Edgar Hoover."

Corrupt politicians,