Sensitive Skin Squad T-Shirts

"Yo! You check the pH lately? I have sensitive eyes, ya know."

Skeptic Tank.

Water the hydrangeas twice a week and trim as needed. The bromeliad only needs to be high-fived on Saturday, but you can give it high and low fives anytime you have a spare moment. Just, whatever you do, don't give it a "too slow" or it will turn inward and begin shutting down.

Desert Dermatologist

"Wow, what are the chances of that four letter word being in your alphabet soup?"

Tips on how to reduce those unsightly crow's feet.

"Stop your whining: as a teenage toad, I had to deal not only with acne, but with warts too..."

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Sebum! I think you'll love this property on the left side of the chin. It's a wonderful place to start a pimple."

"I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. Here, try this."

'Treat me easy this morning.'

"This way, O' Brien."

Fortune teller sits beneath a sign 'Wrinkles Read Here'

"Your problem, Trevor, is that you're very thin skinned."

'You created a new skin disease from scratch.'

"We may go vegan in the cafeteria."

'No wrinkles or botox for me: I naturally change my skin every so often...'

'I'm telling you, with the right moisturizer and lip balm you could avoid all of that chaffing.'

'I've tried everything. My skin is still as dry as an elephant's trunk.'

No sunscreen. Please help.

'Oliver's a very sensitive singer-songwriter.'

ESP Clinic

"No one is completely abominable."

Psychiatrist catches patient's depression.

Gullible prunes.

Spot Check

A dermatologist swats a bug on a patient's back

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie: My name is Morgan Peterson and I work with the finance house here in the Netherlands. Our late client, Mr. Williams, bequeathed his entire $650,000,000 estate to you. He was a big fan of your show. Anyway, so that the funds can be transferred to you, all I need is your bank account number and password, your social security number, name, address, phone number, birthdate, and the times when you are away from home. There is no risk to you. Sincerely, Morgan Peterson. I will h

'Argh, Harold, what happened to you?'

Skin Clinic - Merry Eczemas

'Perhaps, Madam would care to see our low calorie menu?'

Eureka! Great medical news!: 'Remember the 'heartbreak of psoriasis? Those people today are happy, happy, happy!'

'I wish you would have come to see me sooner..'

'He must be allergic to measles. He's come out in spots.'

"Acne"

'I've finally found a moisturizer that really works!'