Secretaries Day Pillows

I type 90 words per minute and shred even faster!

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

I'm looking for employees who have their own unique way of seeing things my way.

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

"Staff support"

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."

'That's our mission statement.'

Copycats

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

"It's clear to me that you want to go far with this company."

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

'Ok, I'm in a paperwork mood. Let 'er rip.'

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

'But I digress...'

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

"If nothing else needs welding, Paula, I'm going to lunch."

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

Boss's Desk Says No!

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

Out and In.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

'T.M.I.F.'