School Antics Pillows

'Well if you don't want to see me in here anymore, then tell the teachers to stop picking on my bad behaviour!'

"Forget about eating homework, I need you to carry my backpack!"

'It wasn't premeditated.

Teacher's pet dog

'Todd don't be such a clown...'

"You are here, but you should be in class!"

'It was self-defense - the clock struck first.'

"So what's your definition of 'love'?"

Steadman - The Early Years.

'You got everyfink Bruv? Stink bombs, pea shooter, dead frogs . . .'

'Now you behave yourself and don't throw and infestation while we're gone.'

"It was a professional hit..."

The Jim Carrey of fish is a real cutup in shool!

Pinata Pranks

"Ms. Thomas, you'll have to come pick up your son. He's swinging from the chandelier claiming that he can and will divide by zero."

"My dad really went ballistic! I'm not grounded...I'm under house arrest!"

"Tech support? I want to get my grades encrypted."

"Why can I only cross 'right' or 'wrong'? What about 'I don't care', 'I don't give a damn' or 'How should I know'?"

That's a silly question. What does it LOOK like I'm doing?'

Calculator Jokes

'And there goes the school window...'

Student to mother: 'What a day. The health teacher left school sick, the debate team got expelled for fighting, the biology teacher dissected the school mascot, and the glee club, in general, went berserk.'

Our poor daughter doesn't have a prom date. Mo-om! I'm going with a group, of friends. No one "dates." Then I don't need a shotgun? Da-ad! I'll never get a boyfriend! Good. I heard that.

'I got caught cribbing from Charley Jones' laptop!'

"Don't be fooled. He isn't a prince and he isn't you pal!"

"You might fake an illness at home, but here, only a fever makes her a believer."

Paul Revere circa 3rd grade.

"What, eat your homework? Again?"

'Pillow fight!'

'Write an essay on what I did last summer? Wouldn't that be a conflict of interest?'

Police Training School.

A good school report at last...how much did it cost you?

'I keep getting leadership mixed up with incitement.'

'Oh, heavens no. I was merely speaking figuratively when I said that I wanted to break every bone in his body.'

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN, 'It's okay, I guess, but they sure hassle you about compliance!'