Scale Ponderer Pillows

Sitting down

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

"We've misjudged the tapas again."

"And on the twelfth day the Lord just puttered around... Did I put that cloud there? Looks out of place. Did I do that? Oh, well..."

"Could you tilt the Earth just a bit more away from the light?"

"Why does this curious plant of his always make me feel gigantic?"

'He knows everything about art. But he doesn't know what he likes.'

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

Idle parts

"Ever wondered about the development of mankind if, just before the big bang, a voice said 'Oops!'"

"If the universe is expanding, that's all the more reason to get back to the city."

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

"I appreciate you have a real passion for music Mr Hibberd. . . but I can see you're going to struggle with the piano."

Of course I believe your 'Alien Abduction' story...

'Harnessing the Black Hole.'

'U.S. Manufacturing'

"Anyway, it turned out that god was a ruddy algorithm after all!"

Are you aware? The Higgs Boson was thought to exist even through no one had seen it!

"If the universe is expanding by 3 trillion cubic light years per second, why can't I find an apartment?"

'I think that's always how it's been!'

'Do you ever wish the Big Bang would have been just a little bigger?'

Dr. McPhee discovers the Embarrassment Particle.

The mysterious world of ligand substitution

Bug to bug: 'Do you think there is life on other plants?'

'We could use more moving and shaking from you, Yomp, and less bobbing and weaving.'

'My research cover two fields: the behavior of matter under high pressure, and the behavior of scientists under high pressure.'

'How would you like your steak, sir?' - 'Big.'

'So we're 52 light-years from home... and now you tell me that you think you left the stove on?!'

God Humor

"Whoa! In 7 billion years, the sun will expand and engulf the entire planet, melting away any evidence it ever existed!"

'What was that big bang out here?'

Fruits and vegetables

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

Physicists at the Fourth Grotschlov Conference assembled to determine once and for all if light is a wave or a particle.