Savings Strategies Gifts

'The only way you can become a millionaire by investing in savings accounts, is to invest millions in savings accounts.'

British savings accounts

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

So I'm "cheap." It's a perfectly good word. And it aptly describes my interest in conserving resources. I suppose we could call you "thrifty." Heavens no! And waste two whole letters? I see we've only wasted one whole tea bag.

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

'That's what I thought, finances are tight: She's switched to no-name cat food...'

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

"I saved us a hundred bucks on a Jolly Jumper."

A little something aside for a rainy day

'We are entering an era of thrift, so in place of champagne and canapes, there will be a jumble sale.'

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

"I just..."

My 5-year-old nephew cut his hair! His mom was so upset until she thought: 'Wait a minute! I just saved 12 bucks!'

"I want you to know that emotion overrode reason."

Department of efficiency and cost analysis.

'I know you're looking for a safe investment but have you ever heard of anyone getting wealthy investing in a bank account?'

Investing your savings

"Sorry, stock-market jitters."

Piggy bank #5: carrying (colour).

Your energy bill is enclosed. You might want to sit down.

"So much for password protected."

"We balanced our budget this month!"

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

Clancy Strip: Money and Beer

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

'Greenspan said today the alert staus for the possible interest rate has been reduced from orange to yellow.'

Lemonade - $500 A Glass! 'Yes, my prices high, but how else am I supposed to buy a Boulevart M109R? Certainly not on my allowance.'

Fries and kids

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

"That thermostat I bought is smart. It knows how cheap I am, so it keeps our home freezing."