Satire Reader Mugs

Declutter Your Life

'I've had it with all you yes-men! -- I'm going to create something with free will!'

"I suppose I could fake it."

'He's always trying to trick people into cheap labour.'

You are here.

'You're office has a question about travel reimbursements.'

"Does this alarm you at all Miss Robbins?"

"Of course, the smoke detectors never stop in hell!"

"I don't know about you guys, but I've had it up to here with the paleo diet."

'The lions leave it over - we eat it. The leopards don't like it - we eat it. If that's not an eating disorder, what is?'

"It doesn't work. I still don't find vacuuming exciting."

"You'll find the book 'Corporate Discipline In Three Easy Steps" in the fiction department."

"You are not lean enough!"

"It's a good job them "injuns" can't aim."

'We loved this book. Twenty nine experts tell you how to think independently.'

'Darling, you got a make-over!'

"Be back soon. Self check in."

Not Everyone Knows Someone like That, Joe

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

Occu-Pie Mars

Trump Administration Raising White Flag in Ukraine

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

'That's our mission statement.'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

Director/Action Man toy.

UK/US Free Trade Deal

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

"I believe we've found the weakest link."

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

Trump pardons

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

Do Not Resuscitate

'I'm judging by your silence Al that you're giving me the green light on the Greenwich project. I just want to say that I admire your leadership. I guess that's why you've been running this company for 20 years.'

Man is stopped from entering doctor's surgery by a receptionist dressed as a bouncer.