Sales Professional Pillows

Active listening, session 1 "I'm afraid turn out isn't as high as we'd hoped,three of them misheard the date,five got the time wrong and everyone in sales went to a hotel in Scarborough by mistake."

Sad boss: "This one pretty much sums it up."

"I'm afraid the turnout isn't as high as we'd hoped, three of them misheard the date; five got the time wrong and everyone from sales went to a hotel in Scarborough by mistake!"

Tissue factory: 'Forget about softness. Tests show we could triple sales if we add pepper.'

'Your resume states that you've worked with 2 presidents, won the Nobel Prize and climbed Mt Everest. That's all fine and dandy, but how are you at telemarketing?'

'And these spikes show the weeks our manager was on vacation...'

'Let's get one thing straight. I don't want your money, I want your respect.'

'We're holding our own, but I'd really like to see some growth.'

"I'm telling you, these Sales Reps get more aggressive every year."

'I'll be honest, this car is way overpriced, gets horrible mileage, and smells exactly like steamed broccoli. . . it does have dual climate control though!'

"The figures for the last quarter are in. We made significant gains in the fifteen-to-twenty-six-year-old age group, but we lost our immortal souls."

'I dunno. Maybe we need a new slogan.'

"I have to start thinking out of the box."

'We would like to visit with you about the possibility of expanding our franchise...'

"It's a setback, but we'll bounce back."

'Is this a piece of artwork or one of our charts?'

'Now here's my idea...we come up with a really high-priced drug to treat drug side effects...'

'You're probably all wondering who I've promoted to VP of sales!'

'Our most successful e-mail campaign was an offer to take customers off our e-mail list.'

Power, Money, Ego, Hype, Parking.

'Do I believe?? Listen, I believe in anything that generates $400 billion in annual sales!'

'Then we all agree, setting up a stress management program is a first priority!'

'Accounting is cautiously optimistic. Sales is incautiously optimistic.'

"Is this seat taken?"

Vehicle Sales.

"Tidy up yer website, gov?"

"And for an extra fourteen hundred dollars I'll stop touching your arm."

Salesman given 10 minutes under extreme pressure to sell to buyer

'We need to target the rich and stupid.'

'This illustrates the first point I'd like to make - we need a projector.'

"To be frank, it's the 'honesty' or 'integrity' that's bothering me."

'And out hospital has rooms...lots of rooms, and some beds, and we've got stairs.'

"Auto, air, V6, dual overhead cam ..."

'A salesman dropped by today. Boy, was he a fast talker.'

"It's a hybrid if you think it is. Runs on gas and the power of positive thinking."