Salad Aficionado Pillows

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

Chef picking salad leaves from a hanging basket outside his restaurant.

'Are you sure you washed this salad?'

'Of course you can't have the chef's salad. What will the chef eat?'

'I'll have the prime rib with the salad bar and he'll just have the salad bar.'

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

Crueltons

"I just have this feeling that if I drove off a cliff, nobody would really miss me."

"Papi, we've decided we want nothing but salads...and hamburgers...for every meal."

"Tell them we only have romaine!"

'-giant Iceberg ahead!'

'What do you want on your salad... oil and vinegar or the house dressing?' 'What's the house dressing?' 'Oil and vinegar.'

Bacon bits at the salad bar.

Rocket Lettuce.

'hat have I done? I'll never put blue cheese dressing on my salad again!'

"And it shall come to pass, Great Caesar, you shall have a salad named after you"

Sneaky salad rabbit.

'Don't tell me you didn't stop at a bar after work. I can smell salad on your breath.'

'Your iceberg salad, Captain!'

"Spinach is fat free, sugar free, and cholesterol free, and it looks it."

"What!?! I like a nice salad every now and then, too. What of it?"

"..and I'll have the rocket salad"

"Did in everyone! There's enough for us all to share!"

The expulsion from the Garden of Olive.

"Whiskey!? I got bad news for you, stranger."

"I feel like I'm cosplaying as a salad bar."

"Barkeeper! More chick-peas!"

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

'Of course you're very dear to me - that meal just cost a fortune.'

'Like death by salad.'

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

Flying sauces.

"The most I'll splurge on my diet is on a boneless, skinless carrot."