Sage Wisdom Seeker T-Shirts

I only know the meaning of life -- Old Goopta over there knows what women want.

"Feel free to take notes."

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

'Do you think that's wise?'

'I'm ninety-two! Tell me what I'm doing wrong... I dare you!"

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

'He was just saying that all things come to him who waits and, sure enough, along came a lightning bolt.'

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

"But how do I accomplish that in 140 characters or less?"

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

"Life's a lottery - That's why you need balls"

'I used to spring forward. Now all I can do is fall back.'

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

"Always take the bull firmly by the tail and look him directly in the eye..."

Beyond the known and the unknown.

'You must heal yourself.'

"Look, if I had all the answers, would I be living alone on the top of a mountain?"

"Smoke a cigar that fits your face."

"Don't you want to hear about the day I had?"

"Do you have an appointment?"

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

Man selling 'pearls of wisdom'.

'O mighty gods! - May you grant us food, clothing, and shelter, and the wisdom to know the difference.'

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

Middle Age: When you finally get your head together, and your body starts to fall apart!

FAQs.

Caveman to kid: 'There's more to life than what you read on cave walls.'

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"