Safety Seeker Pillows

Maybe next tiime you'll hand in the risk assessment on time

'Never mind how far it is from the railroad station. We want to know about asbestos, radon, water pollutants and formaldehyde.'

'You don't think you're just a tad overprotective?'

DIY Electrics reader is being followed by the Grim Reaper.

"I just feel safer in one of these."

'... so I put the combination in the safest place I could think of.'

"If you ask me, that one's a better deal. It has more safety features."

"I'm keeping my large bonus under the bed because it's the safest place. I only risk other people's money."

"Worries about genetic engineering are massively exaggerated. I can count on two tentacles the accidents we've had!"

I can never remember which colour is 'live'. - 'I wish there was a simple way to tell.' - 'Lick it! Lick it! Lick it!' - 'I wish there was a safe simple way to tell.' - 'Lick it gingerly.' -

"It comes fully equipped with all the latest safety features ? aside from the optional life-car."

"I'm looking for something as safe as a biscuit barrel."

'Is it bullet-proof?'

"I wish you'd have made your appointment a little sooner."

'I'm okay with this... I'm not a risktaker.'

"Not enough money is being spent on safety, so be careful."

"Have a good day at school, and don't worry about the killer virus."

Watching astronauts from home

Showroom: Airbags Optional.

Things to Ponder...

"Note to self: Call our insurance agent, ASAP!"

Don't Walk

'Civil defense Captain Penny is going to talk about Tornado awareness.'

TSA Island: 'Sure I guess I feel a bit safer.'

Financial prayers are finally answered

'Have you got anything on the ground floor? I'm a sleepwalker.'

For your comfort and safety sit well back.

"Are you sure? He looks harmless."

Office Furniture.

'It states here you filed an accident claim everyday at your other job.'

'No, you cannot borrow the car.'

'There's never a terrorist around when you want one.'

Turtle crashes, deploys airbag.

"Pull anybody out yet?"

A safe is about to fall on an unsuspecting man interested in risk-free investments.