Safety Precaution Buffs T-Shirts

"And would you put the heading.... 'PLEASE DON'T DO THIS...NEVER DO THIS' in capitals."

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

"They retired me. Just like that. Seems I'm no good over 55 mph anymore." "How does that make you feel?" "Like I want to bash my head against a wall!"

Noah's life jacket demonstration

"Don't forget to put some sunscreen on your tongue."

"We'll get there when we get there!"

"Remember, when you back up, make that 'beep beep' sound."

'I'm filling in for the sommelier. We have a fine shiraz today for only $39. It's 14.7 alcohol, a Class 1B flammable, so if I see you consume it near an open flame, I'll have to cite you.'

Wall Street...

"I am wearing sunglasses and using sunscreen with 50% UV protection. What could possibly go wrong?"

'I tried it at home...'

"Maybe we should have tried it on the rats first."

Mash-Test Dummies.

'Wow. The anti-smoking movement really has been successful.'

Echo Mountain...NO Yodeling! - Falling rock zone.

"The shell has a high SPF, but I still need sunscreen for the rest of me."

"I've seen this before. Keep his head inside the car when the vehicle is in motion."

"Warning! Not to be used as a life saving device."

Halloween health & safety.

Connected Intersections Challenge

'I know the fire's in the kitchen, but that program just irks the hell out of me.'

"Why do you always wear pants?"

'I say we forget about these particular chickens...'

"It's the worst case of Sick Building Syndrome I've ever seen!"

'When it comes to our Boef flambe safety is paramount.'

"You're not a bad dog for driving. You're a bad dog for not wearing a seat belt."

"I childproofed all the cabinets for you."

'Oh no, he's only the Health and Safety Officer.'

'Wow, that's the worst case of tennis elbow I've seen this year!'

'Do not be alarmed... this is only a drill!'

'Wow, thanks for finding my skateboard, daddy!'

Crash Test Dummy Denied Insurance.

My doctor advised me to start walking more.

Acme Candles - In case of fire, break glass.