Rule Book Reader Gifts

"He's our most entrenched bureaucrat. Why'd you go and tell him we have unwritten rules?"

"Holding superstar quarterback accountable—token penalty after the kickoff."

Refereeing for Dummies.

'I'm sorry, Mrs. Harris. I can no longer help people across the street cause of something called liability.'

"She's perfect! She even understands the Infield Fly Rule."

"I followed all the right regulations, but not, necessarily, in the right order."

Dog Crossing

"Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?"

Dog tries to obey No Dog sign

"Sorry, bud. You know the rules... Dibs is dibs."

And if the ball is completely unplayable...

Basically, you should think outside the box, but don't color outside the lines!

He waited for the next wave of regulations to arrive.

'That's our corporate ladder.'

"Turn off cell phones violators will be over ruled."

'You forgot the product label.'

Office computer: 'Thank you for not using me for personal business.'

'Now hold on, Mike. You're talking about embezzlement! And unless I'm very mistaken, that's strictly prohibited in the company's employee handbook!'

'Here are the safety manuals you wanted'

"The deadline for compliance just kicked in."

"Until you're top management, Warrick, I strongly suggest you stay within the lines."

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN, 'It's okay, I guess, but they sure hassle you about compliance!'

She didn't know when her baby climbed onto the prize pile, but she could never turn her back on the international Carny code of law.

'That's not what is meant by a free kick.'

'It's from the Federal Trade Commission -- we have to put in a non-smoking section.'

"Upon further review, the receiver did not establish a meaningful and personal relationship with the football, therefore it is ruled an incomplete pass."

"The bank examiners are here, oh!...I see you already know."

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

'There's nothing in the rules about gloves.'

Business man must jump through hoops to impress his boss.

"He was right, you know - a queen can move as many spaces as she likes."

"Poppa, can you read me the Riot Act again?"

'They're doing their tests now?

Baseball Rules Conference. The actions of this runner are prohibited by the current rules. Next slide, please.

'...so until you get your own place - you live by our rules!'