Royalty Specialist T-Shirts

What's Lady Godiva's name doing on the visitor's log thirty-seven times?

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'You can just forget about the cake.'

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

"I need a little more drama like a ten part mini-series."

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

'How about a game of cards?'

King George I

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

TV jester.

"He's a guard dog."

'The Burrito King.'

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

Czarcasm

'You've made a powerful enemy'

"She wishes to range free!"

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

"It is we."

'How about a game of cards?'

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'Gunboat diplomacy won't work, sire -- we're landlocked, remember?'

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."

'I can't finish -- may I have a peasant-bag?'