Reluctant Ornithologist Pillows

Seagulls attacking Picnicker in Formation

"I am not asking for directions."

"I tried getting good grades without studying, but it isn't working."

"That was one of the hardest exams ever. I don't think anybody got a good grade."

"I belonged to the Audubon Society."

Telling Self to Buzz Off

"There's a house-plant round here somewhere."

Desk boxes: 'In', 'Out', and 'What ever'.

Bird plucking a cello

'Your mother and I want you to know that you wouldn't be hurting our feelings if you decided not to go to University.'

"You'll be pleased to know you haven't got any homework this evening."

'It has nothing to do with relativity. He's trying to figure out his cable bill.'

"What did I learn in school today...I learned I don't like school!"

'I'm sorry I didn't come to work yesterday, sir -- somehow, it seemed like Sunday.'

"Son, we didn't spend a fortune on your education so you can 'just be yourself.'"

'Well! Another near miss! Remind me not to listen to you next time you say it's okay to move in downstairs from a young family and that's not the reason the place was so cheap!'

Man on mobile phone has a bird sitting on the antenae.

"Sorry, dear, but vowing NOT to climb Mount Everest this year isn't a valid New Year's resolution."

'We bought this bolt hole to get away from politicians talking green politics.'

Big Bucks

Feeding the birds.

Hunting - Man asked to go hunting by his wife

'I couldn't decide what to wear to work so I just didn't go.'

'I'm going, but if school didn't have a 'Kids Get In Free' policy...'

"When I say 'tweet' you say 'tweet'...'tweet!'"

"Not one of the Dartford Warblers?"

'Still no takers, did it ever occur to you that they may not like the neighbourhood?'

'I'm home from a mind-numbing day at the office, ready to watch some mind-numbing TV.'

Peckish Cat

"I wish you wouldn't take your enjoyment so hard, Ed."

"Every year it's the same story...dangerous situations. Slippery slopes. Inescapable traps. Horrible creatures. But I trudge forward because no matter what...it's hard to avoid the first day of school."

'You can't do this to me, Arlene! -- I'm not the outdoorsy TYPE!'

Goose Flowchart

'I'm not counting the days 'til school's out. I don't do math unless they make me.'

"Sorry, I can't make it tonight - I have too good a parking sport."