
Clickbait Moses- "Thou won't believe the 10 #life hacks to avoid eternal damnation"
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Clickbait Moses- "Thou won't believe the 10 #life hacks to avoid eternal damnation"
School Board Meeting tonight: 'Evolution or Creationism?'
"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."
"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."
"The hyenas started it."
You got that beer that the monks make, didn't you?
'Yes, all at once!'
"It's cool – God told us to!"
"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."
"Ma, what does 'kosher' mean?"
"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"
The World's Biggest Book Club
'You were great at 'Daniel in the Lion's Den!' -- I'd sure like to hear you do 'The Three Little Pigs' sometime!'
Moses uses the burning bush to roast a kosher frank
"No, this is NOT a beta-test!"
"But you can eat as much as you want from the tree of bullshit."
'Wow! It didn't take long to lose that new ark smell.'
"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"
"It turns out you can 'take it with you' if you pack correctly."
How world war III started.
'We were kind of hoping to let our CONSCIENCE be our guide.'
Hot cross buns
"Mark, you have to stop calling John's gospel 'Fan Fiction.'"
'Well, there go all MY plans....'
'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'
"No, the Trinity is not the Father, The Son, and the Preacher's wife."
Thomas Cranmer
"Actually, I think it's a cluster of SCUD missiles heading our way!"
'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'
'These sure rule out a lot of options....'
"You atheists wouldn't exist without God!"
The Ten Really Cool Facts
"We're in luck, not a word about retrospectivity."
I've founded my own religion. Of course you have, Rudy. It's off to a good start. Already, it's being mocked by people of other faiths. If history's any guide, within a couple hundred years, it'll be widely accepted and people who don't believe in it will be persecuted. What are the central tenets of your religion? A true Rudian knows that life is suffering, and winning arguments online is salvation.
"Are these the Top Ten Commandments?"
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