Reentering Society Gifts

The road from incarceration back to civilization can be rocky

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

Continuing education.

"Er – if you young people don't mind, I have a few things to do now. Perhaps you have a hotel or somewhere to go?"

"Hello? Guys? Okay, I've had a long day and I'm very tired, so no pranks this time. I'm serious... guys?!"

Did you miss me?

"Getting back into the market can be stressful. I recommend a portfolio of sleep-aids, tranquilizers, and antacids.'

'Going back to work now that the kids are grown is one thing, Martha. Mounting a hostile takeover bid of my company is another!'

'I wanted to ask you about life-experience credit.'

The journey's end

"Hold it, Lucy! Here I am!"

I was starting a new chapter in my life and I tripped over a footnote.

"Don't make eye contact. Don't make eye contact. Don't...."

"I'm glad you're open again."

"Mr. Caldwell comes to us from a minimum-security correctional facility in Pennsylvania."

"Your room is exactly how you left it before you went to college, except of course, for our boarder, Mr. Grunze."

"Yes, it's good to see you again too! But all I did was go to the mailbox!"

Rip van Winkle goes back to the office/

Right Here

"It sure is great to have you back for a while at the mother ship."

Soldier With Post Stickers On His Helmet.

"Sorry Santa, I DO want to go to school."

"It is a violation of air national guard policy for you to possess an AK-47 from Iraq, boy!! Do you want to suffer the consequences of bringing back a souvenir?!!"

'On the positive side, we were very impressed with the number of your personal weaknesses you were able to identify!'

'Mr. Crusoe, I'm concerned about this twenty-year gap between positions.'

"Daddy, I want to come home."

"This rush-rush life is getting old. Sometimes, I think about moving back to the land where I way born. What do you think, Baldo? What would you miss the most?"

Coming Home

Sometimes catchy slogans are a good idea and often times they're not.

"I'm broke, I'm back...and I'm willing to discuss law school."

"My mates at the showroom said that I should start dating again."

statue in park: 'Arnold P. Rossiter, a local boy who went to the big city and made it big... and now he's back home, flipping burgers, just like we always said he would.'

Missing the human touch.

The Joys of Retraining

"We truly regret that you were unjustly imprisoned for 63 years, and we're sure you'll enjoy your new-found freedom."