Realization Moment Pillows

"Ok, I've made it. Now I need love."

'I think I just had an epiphany. How do I make it go away?'

Babies first words are 'Take me to your leader'

'My life coach traded me.'

The Final Selfie

"It was only when I started to write the story of my life that I realised I'd forgotten to have one."

The Solution!

"That song in your heart has a nice beat to it."

'Maturity: the instant-degratification phase of life.'

"My new year's resolution. . . .Not to drink out of the toilet."

'OK, how about something a little more upbeat?'

Scientific Tea.

'I hate it when teen angst becomes mid-age angst.'

"I'm just sitting here waiting for an idea who's time has come...but apparently it's running late."

'I am so proud son: It was such an amazing first coak-a-doodle-do!'

"Those image resolutions are crystal clear, but it's my New Year's resolutions that are getting pretty fuzzy."

'I can't read my New Year's resolutions -- I must have spilled beer on them last night.'

"My primary challenge is to strip away the hardened carapace of societal expectations..."

Dear Diary...Resolutions

Who am I kidding?

"I have so many summer videos on my phone, but I don’t remember being there." "Sure. Because you experienced it all through your phone."

'Could you put me into an induced coma for four weeks?'

'I know I promised to get off my backside and take up a sort once the Olympics had finished - but it ain't over yet!'

"I'm having a dry January...Dry Martini, dry sherry, dry gin..."

"Honey, you’re overreacting. I said I think I might be gay."

Resolutions.

"My new years resolution is to stop belittling others...hang on and I'll ask mister two-fries-short of a Happy Meal, what his is."

"Good News! It's today again!"

"Vocabulary lesson. Billy Corey taught me the meaning of the word trouble."

"So! - I have been talking to a brick wall all these years...!!"

"Make up your mind. Do you want to be my password or my security question?"

"My resolution is to not set myself up for failure."

"In solidarity with everyone who is snowed in across the country, I'postponing my New Year's resolution to exercise."