Quirky Medical Rules Admirer Prints

"Sorry, Bob, those are the rules– you drop the kidney, you give them yours."

"Satisfaction, stat!"

Scary Halloween ICD-10 codes.

9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer.

'That's strange, all the monitors are going crazy again!'

"Hiya, hiya, hiya, guy. I'm the bluebird of Prozac."

Man with money in hand reads instructions on 'Check prostate' vending machine

'Gee, Doc - couldn't you just use a rubber mallet to check my reflexes?'

A medical office filing cabinet has drawer labels that read, 'X-Rays,' 'Lab Work,' and 'Exam Room Banter'

'Your prescription is ready. How would you like to finance it?'

"We can serve a rare handburger, but because of health regulations, this room will have to be heated to 160 degrees."

"9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer."

A Mom and Pop Operation

"Of course I'm listening to your expression of spiritual suffering. Don't you see me making eye contact, striking an open posture, leaning towards you and nodding emphatically."

"I can't find anything wrong with you - it must be the drink." "OK - come back when you're sober."

'Eureka! It won't cure anything, but the side effects are terrific!'

"Everybody freeze! This is a stickup!"

Flu Vaccine Delayed By 'Problems with Packaging'.

"Why do I always get the stupid wobbly table?"

'Fortunately my health plan covers equipment.'

Malpractice Problems

'Don't worry, I'll do all I can for you until your health insurance cancels you for getting sick.'

Plastic Surgery

'Well, you're right, you're not touching the ball with your hands, so the Ref can't penalize you...'

'Oops - it's not a stethoscope - it's my ipod!'

Ah ha! Surgeons remove shopping trolley from patient.

'The NHS wants patients to make more decisions about their treatment...so here's your blood tests and a prescription pad, I'll be back later.'

"Pump vigorously if you feel a palpitation. We're still battling with your insurance company for a better pacemaker."

Dr. Potato Head

'No, your wife wasn't wearing clean underwear. She wasn't wearing any underwear at all.'

Guest Houses.

"Open Wide and say, 'aaaaa-men'!"

'I'm administering the anesthetic.'

"Sorry, I don't like your opinion either, can I have a fifth?"

'You're not a wolverine. You're a werewolf.'