Quirky Home Lovers T-Shirts

'And this is the walk-in fireplace... I'd be careful with that.'

'We live in a designer trainer.'

"When you said you lived in a fishbowl, I just assumed you never got out."

Bathroom Fairy

"Oh it's not haunted, it's just really old and nothing works."

'It started out as just a little knot on the floor,'

' ... and this is the half bath.'

His & hers towels.

Newfangled contraceptions phobia: 'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

"I went with weirdness over quantity this year."

'Home is where I hang my bat.'

'Derek was extremely pleased with his new piano stool...'

'Boy, plastic flowers these days are so lifelike: I've been fooled again...'

Missing sock

"How?"

'This place is rather unusually located. Do you folks like sunsets?'

"You know, I think the novelty of living in a converted Barn is starting to wear off."

"Well, as a matter of fact, no, you didn't tell us you kept exotic pets when you sold us the house!"

Red in tooth and claw.

101 uses of a dead cat: rocking horse

"Yes, I appreciate that it's a converted fire station. But I still think I'd prefer stairs."

"Stop complaining, granite is in."

The Arcimboldo Arrangement

Alien with flying spaceships on wall instead of flying ducks

Carpet salesman, "There's a bit of tyre damage, but not so anyone would notice."

"She always gets the upper bunk."

The Ugly Plant

Coming Soon: Haunted Homes on 60-foot lots.

Cuckoo clock in psychiatrist's room

Table Tennis ball-boys

'Oh, it's perfect, George! And it has termites, too!'

"Interesting story behind this one..."

'Pretty useful things, those fridge magnets.'

My first Boyfriend.