Puppy Namer Mugs

Queen to daughter about puppy: 'You won't either name her 'Queenie'!'

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"

Presidential Pooch Meets The Press

"These are my fish cymbalta, otezla, skyrizi, vraylar and stelara!"

"No, we can't get you a new toy every time we go shopping."

Pet Cemetery.

Dog Basket - I consent to petting.

Mrs Sutherland and her American Hairless Terrier.

'I'm sorry about the slippers...but I do need the roghage.'

Wild animal - 1,500 years later...

'I do not pamper the dog, now get out of his chair!'

"Petting, fetching, receiving belly rubs . . . It all adds to your billable hours."

"Stop asking me. I don't know who's a good boy."

"I can't believe how much I love her. Just look at those sienna eyes and that adorable little nose. I honestly don't know how I'd survive without her." "He has food."

"Well, it looks like you found Rexy's sweet spot!"

"C'mon already...that lipstick really isn't my shade."

"… She's simply asking that you no longer refer to her as 'the dog.'"

'Ears up - wag that tail - soulful expression - he is YOURS!'

'No, I've not got names for them but I've got one for my husband!'

Dog Chow Mein

'Don't get me wrong, the professional dog-walker is nice, but it is not really the same as if my Master was walking me...'

"We're callin' 'im Bill, coz he came at the end of the month"

"For future security questions, the name of your first pet should include a minimum of eight uppercase and lowercase letters, numbers and special characters."

Man carrying crates of eggs about to step on sleeping dog.

"It's David."

I think you started off sending him the wrong message when you named him Alpha.

"See, I told you he didn't want to go out."

'Amazing, isn't it? - And she's never taken a parenting class.'

'This is going to hurt me more than it will hurt you!'

Canine Tours

Caution: Feeding the dogs under the table leads to the next inevitable step.

"With this policy, at the age of 12, he receives 10 marrow bones a month."