Pulpit Pastry Ponderer Pillows

Thou Shalt Not!

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

Happy thoughts

Down a the lab - Germs "So what will you do when you grow up?" "Oh the usual...divide,multiply,infect,kill.."

Corner Bakery ... Bread and Breakfast.

"You order the raspberry danish?"

'I'm sorry but my little boy, Jack, ruined them all today.'

"Actually, it wasn't so bad. One minute I was standing in line at the slaughterhouse...The next thing I knew, I was being basted in my own juices..."

"Your Honor, prior to sentencing, if it please the court, I'd like to make just a few brief remarks about pâte brisée."

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

'Hey, honey bun!'

'Well,we had a good run.' - Worldwide Hops Shortage.

"Leave it you guys! We have this EVERY-SINGLE-TIME we go anywhere!!"

Dateline - Caf

'When they start calling you a splendid bird, you know you're in trouble.'

'Sticky nuts...' "Umm nice nuts but not as sticky as us buns!!"

"They're going to print a retraction - your desserts are not inconsistent."

Heavy man wants the cake and Edith too.

The Old Dun Cow - Bitter & twisted.

"What do you have that justifies its calories?"

"Yes, there will be questions but you're unquestionably the nation's most badass mom."

"The doctor will see you now."

If we reproduce fast enough, we'll outnumber everybody and take over the petri dish! Divide and conquer, eh?

"Who's next?"

Elevator Repair School. First thing, forget the old saying "What goes up, must come down"!

"We need to have a meeting because I have the doughnuts."

Sensitivity Training For Bulls.

'Dr. Fenton discovers a new killer cell.'

"I think I'm allergic to peanuts."

This could be interesting...

Dr of Philosophy/Dr of Philo Pastry.

Square root of chicken is egg.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

"We're looking for a hacker to break into our competitors computers and get their recipes."