Publishing Comedy Enthusiast Pillows

"This is shit. We're going to publish it."

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

Police Feline Unit

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

"His first out-of-body experience."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"I've done this procedure so often I could do it in my sleep. But that's only happened twice – that I'll admit to."

Selling lemon latt�

Do Not Resuscitate

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

"The fish sticks here are very good."