Public Transit Ponderer Prints

"I gave you the wheel and this is what you did with it?"

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

'Our basic package is no frills, no chew toys, no extra Kibbles, and narry a pat on the head from management...'

'Euro's down against the pound, dollars up against yen, pound is... what the hell don't expect cheap meals in France!'

When the Job Market Shifts, Always Remember That It's All Your Fault

"Apparently, over two-thirds of the Earth's surface is covered with water!"

Planetary Science. What do we call the study of gas giants in space? Gastronomy.

"I gave on the E train."

"You're right! It is much easier to explain it this way!"

"The problem is: reasonable men may differ on what the hell reason is!"

Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Earth, Venus, Mars … Mercury … Um, Pluto? Charon? No, Pluto … or Eris? Ugh …

'The shrink said my holiday was hereditary - my family.'

How moons are born...

Jupid/Jupiter/Jupidest

Parson wishing to seem as though he is not drinking

"Beats me - I've never dealt with a sovereign debt crisis before."

'I'm sorry, sir, this is the department of Immediate Dissatisfaction. Your appointment is with the Bureau of Eternal Frustration.'

Enter Exit - Circle of Life.

Train Arrivals

Spiderman's tummy rumbles on the subway

"This is not the sort of America I envisioned, Tom-an America in which the middle class has to use public transportation."

Note to self: feathers.

Ernie, we're the first humans to set foot on Mars! This is so exciting! The whole world is watching! Whee! We need to do something for the history books. Woo hoo! Ernie, you're not appreciating the gravity of the situation. What gravity?!

If there are eclipses of the sun and eclipses of the moon, how come there are never any eclipses of the earth? Can we continue this tomorrow? It's getting dark.

'Does it really matter where I'm going?'

'You don't have anything in a smaller size do you?'

Oil consumption.

He's not much of a philosopher

"You're always in a bad mood when you visit."

"Of course - we wait forever, then come at the same time,"

Congestion of the Electric Car

World Demand Price Up

'Who crossed the road first, the chicken or the egg?' Francis has always struggled with philosophy.

Like every morning, Mitch thought that happiness could be measured by the statistical probability that his train would arrive on time.