Public Radio Patron T-Shirts

'We're strong supporters of public radio and emoticons.'

"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."

“I may not know much about books, but I do know which titles burn best.”

"I'll have another Rob Roy and a cup of coffee for my friend here."

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

'The Saxon King' pub

Surreal ale

Non Thought For The Day.

"Gotta go, lads, I smell death."

"An appointment? Let's see... She could fit you in before breakfast TV, or after lunch on Radio Two, or between Radio Four afternoon and the Drive Home SHow..."

"I just saw some confused old goat pee all over the bathroom floor." "That was a mirror. And that wasn't the bathroom."

'I'm a voice over artist.'

The passing of a radio/tv personality.

Pub Kendo.

Clive Anderson

"Well I think the Real question is..."

"It's easy for me. Three beers and I'm in the zone."

Please help: National Endowment for the Arts

"Ignore gordon. He's had a snootfull."

'Your wife doesn't understand you. . .'

Books recommended by Oprah and Howard Stern.

"Ray Brown on bass, Elvin Jones on drums, and Alan Greenspan on interest rates."

'Crumbs! I'm holding out for the whole loaf.'

New symbol for Public TV: 'The tin cup' (PBS)

Sue Perkins

'I badly need to speak to my husband - can you get me a job as a barmaid?'

'One thing about beer -- you never get buyer's remorse.'

"Ah, summertime! Robert Potts is sitting in for Jim Jensen, who is sitting in for Harry Reasoner, who is sitting in for Walter Cronkite, who is on vacation."

'Can you do me a low alcohol tequila slammer?'

Theatrical Christmas.

'Boozer's Week.'

Rule Britannia!

Terry Wogan

'It's very quiet in here, with everyone Twittering away.'

Good morning and welcome to National Public Radio, you bloated capitalist swine!