Public Affairs Pillows

"If we're going to keep this quite, we'll need a public enquiry."

Attempting to a Political Career

Elections kitchen.

'Have you tried watching C-SPAN?'

VOTE, 'I'll cut the waste out of government no matter HOW much it costs!'

"The fact they all end as a whitewas is not the point. They serve to keep a lot of snouts in the trough."

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

"Nation-building never works."

Hollywood Sign Developers

'That's our mission statement.'

Who will determine Venezuela's future?

'How fast can you hype?'

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

Apart from your mother, who else thinks you're doing a good job as Chairman of the company?

"National security adviser"

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract."

"...And do you Sean Spicer take Kelly Anne Conway..." "The marriage of alternative facts"

BBC - Crisis Management, Damage Control and Liability Supervision.

'Fred, I want you to sanitize this, punch it up, dumb it down, leak it to the media and then be fully prepared to deny it!'

'All those in favor of having anchovies on our pizza will signify by saying aye.'

"The best part is that we got hell to pay for it."

Pity vs. Bragging and Public Relations

Public Relations: Reputations cleaned and repaired

Library - Political Science section - 'What to do until the spin doctor comes'

'Before we starnt, has everyone shed their moral baggage?'

Businessman sees door sign 'Department of Mismanagement and Overbudget'.

XYZ Inc, putting a folksy, human face on unfettered corporate greed for over 50 years.

"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."

'This one is for keeping 'On Message' in the spin wars.'

Enterpe, Terpsichore, Calliope, and Bernie, their agent.

'Our company has hit an iceberg and is sinking fast. Of course, it's all very symbolic.'

'The question is - to what level of data do we wish to stoop.'

"As a rookie, I'm finding one of the hardest things to get used to is older people calling me 'sir.'"

Death to the Extremists

"Nice work on that German contract. You've made your mark, Ashworth."