Psychological Ponderer Pillows

'No matter what I try, it seems that I just keep coming back to the same place in my life.'

"Needs to get a life"

'You're right, Mr, Haskins, those were extremely 'normal' word associations. Now let's try it without the thesaurus.'

'You will eventually discover that all women are the same. The only difference is how deep you have to go before you see the pixels.'

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

In/Out/These Things Happen.

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

Jean-Paul Sartre

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

Chiller Theatre

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"Have you been playing dice?"

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

Sauce for the Goose

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

I don't think I'm letting sunlight in when I open the curtains. I think the darkness is going out.

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

"I guess now's as good a time as any."

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

Admissions test for the Danbury Institute of Philosophy

"Is this who I am?"

'Look at it another way. Happiness can't buy you money!'

"I cross the road to forget."

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

Afraid of change - leave it here.

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.

'...and that is my philosophy.'

Non Thought For The Day.