Professional Listener Gifts

' I bet you here this kind of thing all the time. '

I have very few things in life to worry about...and that is making me worried!

"'Customer care' involves more than reading the memo..."

Audio Books

Try me/try me/try me...

"I need him to stop think and start listening."

I can hear a podcast of yesterday's sea.

'You are a very good nurse. You're actually listening to what I'm saying.'

Pet Shop - Parrot labeled as 'Good Listener'

"I suppose we should start with listening skills!"

'There you go again - trying to solve my problems. I am not asking you to do that. I just want you to listen to me.'

Broccoli: Just Full of Surprises!

"Go ahead. Tell me your troubles. I promise to say 'Awww' in all the right places."

Attention Span Man

Psychiatrist with bartending diploma

"Officer, I'd like to report... a sexual assault. I was at a part, this guy... he attacked me."

"I feel like my emotional baggage is permanently stuck on the luggage carousel."

'You're not listening to what you're hearing.'

'I'm afraid turn out isn't as high as we'd expected...three of them misheard the date, five got the time wrong and everyone from marketing went to a hotel in Norwich by mistake.'

'I'm going to put you in touch with reality.', 'Can't I just sneak up on it?'

"I'll knock 10% off this session as I wasn't really listening."

Science Applied to Art

"Doctor, I find you very easy to talk to."

"If you think I talk too much, you should come right out say so! That way we can talk about it."

'I wonder if TED ever listens.'

'She doesn't know that listening is not the same as mentally rehearsing her answers.'

Here's your problem. You have an iPod.

'Noise? When you've been married as long as I have, it goes in one ear and out the other.'

"How did I get to be the only one that listens?"

Today, this humble feature attempts to answer one of the great quandaries of modern times. Is it Louie Louie, oh baby, my hair gotta grow? Wrong! What are the lyrics to the Kingsman's Louie Louie?* *Must be gleaned by listening. No peeking on the internet!

Harold finally decided to take his psychiatrist's advice to become more receptive.

Patient is listening to the doctors conference about him.

'I think I'm highly insightful for my age and don't call me missy!'

"...But rock bottom is my comfort zone!"

"My super powers are listening and downsizing my life."