Probiotics Mugs

"If you order from our wellness menu, you get a side of yogurt with every dish."

"I take a probiotic. Ed swears by beer and peanuts."

"The yoghurt, does it contain bifidobacteriumi and lactobacillus bulgaricus?"

The Jeopardy of Progress

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated.

Schengen

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"Welcome to the future"

Hate Platforms

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

Sen. Krupt. I don't tell constituents that we're fueling inflation. I say we're protecting consumers and thanks to us they won't have to worry about buying any cheap stuff.

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

Rare earths are the key to a greenwashed, technotopian future

'The meek shall inherit the debt. The rich shall inherit the loopholes.'

'Let's just wait here until the federal stimulus returns.'

E.U. Banking Union.

G7 Tax Multinational Companies

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

'And this one's framed in beautiful Brazilian hardwood.'

'What's wrong with those Europeans? We have more murders in this city than England, France Germany and Spain combined.'

'He's downgrading the credit agencies.'

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

'Well, kids, it all started with a massive Federal program to combat global warming....'

US v.s. Tech Giants

World Economic Crisis.

It's a new government directive requiring us to be 58% more cheerful within 18 months.

America's Funniest Interest Rate Hikes

Moses holds up new federal regulation guidelines.

"Somehow, they get exempted from a lot of laws."

'The government's right. Not counting, food, clothing, energy, shelter, health care, or transportation, inflation is hardly going up.'

Earth stove

Minority Report

Flat tax - equal burden?

Russia Money Laundering

'The recession is over, again.'