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"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

"Jill Hamster's entrepreneurial disaster"

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

"The pizza came late and it was cold!"

"In layman's terms, it's £12,750."

'We don't know what it is but it was in the sale so we thought we'd better get one before they sold out.'

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

"Would you like to see the markup?"

GAS. If you have to ask, you probably can't afford it.

'Congratulations, Forester. Your ingenious scheme to cut production costs ... In anticipation of this inevitable development, we are reducing your salary.'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

'It's amazing! I'm a magician! I can make a weekly wage disappear in four hours!'

We Never Look at Prices Shop.

'Take five Harry, I'm going on ahead to scout for sales'

"The sales don't start until next week but I saved a huge amount of time by buying everything today!"

Capitalism gone nuts!

The Horror Film Director.

"I see the businessman's lunch is up 50p."

'We're facing a hostile takeover.'

"Now, is this the kind of painting you mommy would be proud to post on her Instagram?"

Artist painting a cat.

"I thought I'd be quids-in but I can't shift the bloody stuff."

'At least someone can afford to travel by train.'

"Times are perfect for us masochists!..."

Bureau of Inflation.

'What a bargain!'

"I really hate sales meetings"

'What's the situation about new wands these days?' - 'You can't beat 'compare wands.com.'

"That will be $109.85." "What! Sign says they’re $1.69 each." "Yes, and you have 65 of them."

Gas prices up.

"You can't beat the prices of these big box retailers."

'I can lend 100% on the new car, but only 70% on the tank of gas.'

One of the lesser known joys of being a fencing instructor.