Preserving Food T-Shirts

The little preservative that could

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

'A little piece of advice, Verl. . . cut your sandwich loaf on a diagonal . . . that way people will think they're gettin' more.'

'I cleaned over thirty fish today.' - 'That takes guts.'

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

Wendy likes horses...and she is a keen cook.

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

'The vegetables sat in the crisper for hours...days...a whole week. Then suddenly, the drawer opened. A hand reached in, grabbed the kale, and all you could hear was the sound of...A Garbage disposal.'

There! I've made my year's supply of zucchini bread! That's kind of a lot. How can you store them all? It's no problem. I just throw out last year's supply.

"Karen's idea of wine reduction..."

Surprise in the salad bowl

The Gardener's Holiday: Don't leave produce behind you to perish.

“Our numbers grow greater and greater. Soon the era of the spices will be at hand”

Recipe involving the switching off of the smoke alarm...

"I hope you're not using any of the canned food I so diligently stockpiled.

'Ugh, I hate food with preservatives.'

'I don't know how much more of this I can take!'

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

Culinary surgery.

Bonita shows up late for the girls' Thursday night 'Jam Session'.

A butcher and his apprentice.

Macho Vegetarian

"All good things must come to an end...unless I use both of my giant-size super-pots."

'Are you sure you don't have any Indian blood?.'

'Isn't it great? It gives us four times the storage space as a regular fridge!'

"How much longer on your visionary gnocchi, Stefano?"

Mankind's earliest ancestor emerges from the primordial ooze, closely followed by a prehistoric species of re-sealable plastic containers.