Prehistoric Comic Reliever Gifts

'Ha, ha! -- Neanderthals can't jump!'

You Are Here

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

Overjumpers

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

"Brian's fine. He`s got his own coping mechanism."

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

'It's the report from the consultant. He says we should turn over the turnovers to improve turnover.'

Look! Up in the sky! It's absurd! It's inane! It's Malaprop Man! Malaprop Man, I hear you're fighting climate change now. Yes starting with solo panels, I'm reducing greenhouse guesses! I'm investing in buttery technology. I'm going to have windmeals. And of course, I've stopped drinking cola. Why is that? I'll have a smaller carbonated footprint!

Cat with Lion reflection in mirror

"Touché"

"We are gathered here to morn the passing of Bob Opossum."

Though Mr. Frackman had yet to say a word, Bill sensed he was about to receive a particularly lousy performance review.

"Ever eat a bird?"

'Tommy is in the other room playing with the triangle we bought him in Bermuda.'

The First Printed Bible

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

"That's where the pain gets me, doc."

"It says here on your resume that one of your qualities is a sense of humor. Care to elaborate?"

"Trust me. Don't do it."

"First, we'll look for repressed memories of malpractice suits."

"Aren't we going a little overboard with Friday's casual dress code!?"

'To err is human... but to forgive is against company policy!'

A kid squirting gunk from an umbrella.

"Saving Lois Lane a dozen times doesn't mean you can claim her as a dependent on your taxes."

'I think my teacher has a crush on me. She's holding me back for another year.'

"What kind of sinker are you using?!"

When Holy Cows Are Sent Out To 'Pastor'.

'No no!! Not that one... The BIG one on the top shelf!!'

My therapist cured me of using humour as a defense...these days I pack a .45.

Comedian faces audience of clowns: 'Ooh, tough crowd.'

“Rumor has it, it’s happy hour.”

Break Glass in Case of Stress

"The good news is it's brightening up..."