Pessimist Partners T-Shirts

The pessimist and the paranoid

Worry tank

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

Platitudes for the hopelessly realistic. When life gives you lemons, get a gift receipt.

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -

"If, indeed, there is a reason for all this, than that's so much worse."

Tom's last day.

The End is Near art gallery opening.

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

"Are we pessimists and our stomachs are half empty or optimists and our stomachs are half full?"

'Barnhill from Marketing will present our economic projections.'

"Die alone"

"A glimmer of hope is fine, Hendricks, but anything more than that will lead to massive disappointment."

Lent is a real drag this year. - 'Why? What did you give up?' - 'Hope.' - 'I gave up chocolate. Guess what?1' - 'What?' - 'I've made my ideal weight! Yay!'

A Stray Curmudgeon in a Field of Perennial Optimists.

Half Empty/Half Full/I'm Still On Vacation!!!

Things can only get worse...

"What? You were expecting good news? Expectations are so-o-o-o passe."

'Have you seen the financial pages?' - 'Yes, things are going to get a lot worse before the get worse.'

This will be a banner day for you!

"Actually, it was an excellent year for bottom feeders."

"Look, a shooting star- let's critique it!"

'I'm afraid things have to get worse before they can get even worse.'

"This feels like the start of something that will eventually break one of our hearts."

All my silver linings have clouds around them.

'Against Joie De Vivre': Meet the author today.

The split end is near.

'Do we have to go through this every year Henman says he can win Wimbledon?'

Battery Juice Bar

'It seems that he was too optimistic. His glass of water wasn't half full. Obviously, it was completely empty.'

"It's a win-win to expect the worst. If I'm wrong, that's fortunate. If I'm right, I'm vindicated."

"You really don't need a good life, just a great obituary writer."

'(Sigh!) I doubt if the country will ever have a mood of optimism again....'

Pessimists Anonymous - chart.

"Breakfast is my favorite meal because the day hasn't been ruined yet."