Personal Library Curator Pillows

"Look alive, Proust, you're next."

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

You're my Mona Lisa.

At the Museum

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

"You've got a long, long road ahead of you, young man."

Paul Klee

Squirrels Stockpiling Mulling Spices for Winter

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

The Googler

'That's about it so far, Son.'

'We're gonna need a bigger moat...!'

'Of all the nerve!...Making us sit through the whole of their Bayeux Tapestries!!'

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

"And this is our media room."

Children's artwork exhibition.

Physician tending a mummy.

"An unfortunate museum gift shop." "Banksy activity set." "Jackson Pollock coloring book." "MC Escher building blocks." "Claes Oldenburg miniatures." "Marceau Marceau CDs." "Seurat's connect-the-dots aaAAAAA."

'It's a Joan Biro.'

"Personally, I'm a doer."

Barcode on Ancient Greek Vase

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

'They look more up to date than the ones in your tool-box.'

"Anachronism or not, it just ain't the fourth without the ribs and Willie Nelson."

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

The Hall Of Mirrors Jeretski Palace, Plovdo

Video Henge: made from melting and molding 3,000,000 obsolete VCR tapes.

Misunderstood artist

Fertility goddess. Nanny goddess.

It's a call from Tate modern.

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

'I'm sure he was a great guy, but there's a new Pharaoh in town.'

Schools of Art - A Rough Guide.