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First aid departments

Opportunities in Coronatimes

2021

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

vaccine wars.

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

"Our war is against cancer."

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

'You're overdue for your checkup.'

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

"The prostate biopsy shows your pain threshold is much higher than normal."

'Well, well, well...'

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

Vehicles are having their own election. These are the candidates. The ambulance appeals to voters who think health care is most important. Voters focusing on education issues favor the school bus. And those wanting family-friendly policies are backing the minivan. The tractor is an expert on agricultural issues, and the import is a free trade advocate. Those voters concerned about environmental issues like the electric hybrid, and those wanting a strong military support the Jeep. What's t

"I'm feeling completely wiped out."

"The first one's just a warning."

"I'm afraid you could go at any time."

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

Social distancing

"What's that mark on your arm, Mama?"

PSA Banter.

Doctor pulling golf caddy sees patient pulling oxygen caddy.

"The doctor wanted me to let you know that everything is fine, but your c-section didn't go quite as planned. it was more like a 'K' section..."

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."

Deaths from Coronavirus

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'