Password Detective Gifts

I saw your "free wi-fi" sign. Yes, it's free for customers. False advertising! If I have to buy something, it's not free! Ok. The password is "buysomethingorgetout." Is that upper-case or lower?

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

'What we've got here is a failure to communicate.'

"Always remember, sweetheart, that when the service is free, YOU'RE the product!"

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

'I think the new V. P. of Global Development is here.'

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

Computer Expert

Where was I?

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

Terry had a computer bug.

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

"Has the Wi-Fi seemed slow to you lately?"

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

'Mark my word, Walters, this is no ordinary virus.'

"Yes, you were born into the era of passwords and user-names. . . why do you ask, Mycat_2014?"

"Looks like Brandon got caught with his hand in the password jar."

"Careful! He knows computers."

Clickbait

"So who is this First pet?"

'Kumor's responsible for all the computer passwords, so the boss had him encrypted.'

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

'If I've learned anything, it's believe half of what's in the newspapers, and even less of what's in your e-mail.'

'An application won't be necessary, Sir. . . if you did it, we know about it.'

"Prove you're not a human Select the squares with a bike Skip"

'Ok, give me your username & password one more time.'

'Should I just hit 'reply to all' and save the government the trouble?'

'I'm sorry, Jason. I don't date anyone new until I've googled them.'

"We've updated our privacy policy...it's so private we can't even tell you."

Computer Crimes

Information about information about information about information.