Online Shopping Critic Prints

"Didn't I warn you about buying medication from the internet?!"

"...There was no such thing as ordering it through the interwebs, or whatever the heck you call it."

How Amazon was invented

Amazon Drones Delivering Babies

"Do you remember ordering 1,345 cans of tuna?"

North Pole twinned with Amazon

Your Entire Life Delivered To Your Door!

"YAY! FREE SHIPPING!"

'The little piggy went to market, this little piggy stayed home and shopped online...'

"We can do it on the net now... so it's off to the knackery for you."

Terms and conditions

Starbucks doubles its sales by devising a way to sell coffee over the Internet,

Buy on-line - Fill in form, Fill in form again, And again, Lose form, Fill-in form a few more times, Give up and go to shop...

"I guess we'll know ol' Mr. Willis is dead when the Amazon packages stop arriving."

"We can now shop for, purchase and crash our new car online."

Your basket: Gold. . .You may also like: Frankincense and Myrrh.

"You get one every time you order something online."

"So, with internet shopping and guaranteed next-day delivery, I figured now was as good a time as any to hang my sack up and retire."

Internet Shoplifting

"What's the cheapest thing we can order and still get a box?"

"I'm sorry, your grapefruit subscription ran out and I forgot to renew it."

You Shouldn't Have

"Aren't you glad we stayed in? I had time to order us some more sweatpants."

Click - 'View basket' - 'click' - 'Proceed to checkout.' - 'Con't untick box if you don't not want to not recieve e-mail marketing.' - 'Calm, Peel. Calm...' -

"I didn't hear the full story, but you came from either the stork or ebay."

Drones

'I found it on Craig's List.'

I just bought a new Kindle Voyage. It's much better than my Kindle Paperwhite. Blasphemy, little buddy. A real man lugs around a paperback that he's milled from a fallen Redwood that he lifted off of a baby deer, before reuniting the fawn with its mother. I bought if off of Amazon. I didn't even use "one-click." I used the shopping cart and chose all the options manually. Almost as impressive. I keep it old-school.

"I'm developing an app that solves the problem of not being able to buy things slightly more conveniently."

"My Doordash driver is at the front gate."

"Ah, sweatpants."

'Don't forget to delete cookies when you shop online!!"

"I'm just checking eBay to see if there's any movement on that new liver you need."

"It's a pitch spork. I bought it online."

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