Office Motivator Gifts

People, what a fantastic opportunity for a reset!

"I think our mission statement could use a little more zing."

"I always try to give out at least one genuine compliment per day. I don't always succeed."

'Since we programmed all of Sousa's marches into their IPOD's, production is up 27%.'

'The Rush Orders department is a shambles, Briggs, and I think you're just the man to turn it around,'

'Now that I have your attention...'

That shows business confidence.

What's wrong with the computer you've got?"

"We've decided your suggestion to have a day care center here at work has merit."

'I've stepped on so many people for the last 20 years to get where I'm at, and I'm still only a middle manager.'

"I'm Jackson, your new micro-manager."

"Best project manager we ever had."

'If you can keep him clean for a day you can sleep in his bed tonight.'

Office Dunce.

'On your marks. Get set. Go!' - 'Come on! Keep going! You can do it!' - 'Yay! You're 8 hours closer to the grave!' - 'Oh, God.'

'What can I do to create a climate where things get done?'

Dave realised that Clive didn't see problems,only 'challenges to be embraced'.

'Great idea, Philpott. Wish you'd thought of it.'

When we believe together we achieve together.

"I'm sending you to Siberia. Your job is remaining here."

"They grow up so fast."

Attitudes are contagious. Is yours worth catching?

"We finally found a way to bottle enthusiasm."

I didn't want to become the company president, but the board of directors left me no choice. You were backed into a corner office.

'A good leader can lead them to water, but a great leader can also make them drink.'

"So, it's agreed - we lay off the stick and hit them hard with the carrot."

Office Politics

'...and if you guys keep screwing up, I'm gonna have to start kicking some butt!'

We're one big happy family here. What I'm looking for is a man who can make it work.

"Why don't you try learning from your own mistakes?"

Suggestion box: 'Build a bigger Complaints box'.

Sinking sales

"Corporate thinks it's time we updated our motivational strategies."

"Yes, we do have an incentive scheme - fall below that line and you're sacked."

'You're my best employee. You're punctual, ambitious and precise. The problem is ... it scares the devil out of my other employees.'