Office Historian Gifts

"I've worked here for thirty years..."

"I've worked for the company for 40 years..."

'Meet Charles, the office 'old-timer'. He's been hangin' around stock tickers, water coolers, copy machines, and now laser printers for 40 years!'

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated.

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

"1984 by George Orwell. Project 2025. Presidential transition project."

Trump Administration Raising White Flag in Ukraine

"You're fired."

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

Gender Equality

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

Who will determine Venezuela's future?

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

Albania and North Macedonia: entrance denied

Great Chinese Dynasties

'What would your mum say if she saw you drawing all over the wall like that?'

Valuable business advice from some famous disruptive technologies.

"'I don't want war'. . . well, wither our translation program is broke or this president has a strange kind of humor!"

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

"Agamemnon and Clytemnestra have decided to separate amicably."

Demure lady with gloves

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

Pretty Flowers

Torturing the English Language

"Guess who brought king cake!"