Nurses Pillows

"OMG! I just got born!"

"He's complaining of chest pain, shortness of breath, cramps and dizziness. Do you sell earplugs?"

'O.K. people, it's time to test our work...'

'First, let me give you something for the pain.'

Man sees goldfish swimming in his IV bag.

MRSA Risk.

"Lucky we caught it early. It's easier to treat in the larva stage."

Healthcare workers come to the N.H.S. Fancy dress party dressed as viruses.

"You don't mind the psychometric test, do you?"

Hospital Reception - Ring for assistance

"I'm afraid we've had to move him to expensive care."

"The most common adverse vaccine reaction after the first dose is trying to get the second dose."

"On reflection, I admit the hernia stitches were too tight."

Doctors Without Boundaries

'You play the nurse and I'll play God.'

Elderly lady about elderly man: 'We met in ICU. We had a rheumatic encounter.'

"First of all, where and what is a prostrate?"

ICU!

The Woodstock Medical-Emergency Tent - 1994

"...In the long run, we'd like patients to see an accounts clerk, nurse, and resource manager before they get anywhere near the doctor..."

'Thank's for your patience as we transition to electronic filing. . . Mrs. McGillicuddy.'

N.H.S.Trust.In box/out box(Resucitate/Do not resuscitate).

'We can do extensive blood work, take x-rays, check your prostate. . .or I could sell you some great weed for $50.'

"We lose a little dexterity, but we gain a lot of confidence."

'It kind of brings a tear to your eye -- a whole new generation of little consumers.'

"Everyone who's unhappy with their health system is here."

"I feel fine but according to my smartwatch I might be dead!"

"Well....THAT�S never happened before"

'Congratulations! You've just downloaded a baby boy.'

'The doctor will see you now -- I can't promise that he'll talk to you, but he'll see you.'

"I see this a lot with people who are starting to come out of a coma. The first thing they want is their phone."

All New Prescriptions Require FBI Approval.

Looking for the cause of high health care costs. . .

'Let's all practice bug control.'

Police officer giving ticket to paramedics.