Nursery Rhyme Aficionado T-Shirts

"First, we need to stabilize his spine!"

'I don't do 'slip and fall,' but if you're ever in need of a good tax attorney...'

"Funny-all the king's horses don't seem to be helping at all."

"Proving negligence on the wall owner will be difficult, especially since you had no business up there."

"You're kidding!...You mean, all the King's horses and all the King's men tried putting you back together again too?"

"Hello, medic alert? I've fallen and I can't get up!"

"Do you or do you not have any wool, and if so, how many bags full?"

'Frankendumpty'

'Bridges falling down, killer pumpkin eaters, blind mice with carving knives... I can't Take it Anymore!'

'There's some huffing and puffing outside. It's either the big bad wolf or a stroppy teenager with an attitude.'

'He's smashed.'

'Jack not so nimble.'

'Why does London Bridge keep falling down? Sounds like lawsuit material to me!'

'I'll place the bets. You just be sure to hit the hare with the tranquilizer.'

"I'm afraid the news about your husband is grim, Mrs. Dumpty...."

"We've done all we can. Call in the King's Men."

'Frankly, if all the King's men couldn't put him together again, what chance do we have?...'

"We've evicted the old woman and put the kids in care."

Your dad howling at the moon sounds pretty lame! Me, my mum jumped over it...

'...and the dish ran away with the trendier spork.'

CSI Nursery

"Damn! I'm in the wrong fairy tale. This is the three little pig's house, not the three bear's!"

"The prognosis is not good: you will grow worse tomorrow and die on Saturday."

The little old lady who lived in a shoe in Antarctica.

'Are you made of sugar?'

'London Bridge? I thought it had fallen down?'

Old woman heh?. Didn't know what to do, heh?

'I think you'll enjoy this change of pace, Sire. Four and twenty blackbirds, peanuts and a prize!'

'Our relationship has never been the same since Jeff ran off with that spoon...'

'Actually, I don't know what I was thinking hiring you, Jack.'

"Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon base..."

'This 'once-upon-a-time...' Was it yesterday, this morning, a hundred years ago, or what?'

H. Dumpty survived the fall, but had to wear adult diapers the rest of his life.

The Hey Diddle Diddle Orchestra

'Mr Dumpty, I'm taking you off walls...and risky investments.'