Nostalgic Observers Gifts

In my day, they didn't give free lunches to poor children in school. If your parents couldn't afford to feed you, you went without. When you saw rich kids and their fancy sandwiches, you didn't expect the government to even the scales for you. You pushed them down in the dirt and stole those sandwiches on your own! I think I read about you in "Lord of the Flies."

'That's Josh as a fat, bald baby. The only difference now is he has a goatee.'

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

'Big audio gear is coming back!'

"String ... you mean it doesn't have a remote controller to operate it?"

"Honey! Where are my lucky Incredible Hulk board meeting socks?!?"

'It's one of Larry King's earliest shows.'

"These colder temperatures always cause my tire pressure to drop—it's a good thing I stopped to check." Peter finally grows up.

'Dewey! Grandpa's stuck again. Give him a couple of whacks upside the head.'

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

"We're airship people, not mega-airship people."

Ten Plagues for Today's Seder

"We made all the wheels out of old coffee tables and chandeliers."

'I think I'll stay in and try to catch up on my reading.'

'I'm just not as ambidextrous as I used to be.'

Before the Internet

'It's one of these new phones that takes photographs.'

'I don't care what the Hares have. Dial-Up is good enough for us!'

"Pardon me, Vito, but I'm holding the talking stick now."

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

Teddy bear with a red balloon.

'Bring out yer books!'

"I made you a mixtape."

"The following film has been formatted to fir the screen of the newer and more expensive television set."

'I met him on a Monday and my heart stood still (would you believe?)')

"Remember back in the day when I was a real heartbreaker?" "Riiight... now the only thing you break is wind."

'Take my tip,sonny and say it with jelly babies.'

Elvis Presley

Photographer Phone: 'Okay everybody, SMILE!'