Newbie Dad Adventures T-Shirts

"The head, the head! I told you, always support the baby's head!"

'I've had some baby sized clubs made.'

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

'We found you in a cabbage!'

"That's mine!"

Doughboy Dad

"It's a boy, ... and two girls, then another boy, another girl, and there more boys."

"You know what they say, there's one born every minute!"

"Please doctor, hit him again. I need to get that ring-tone."

"Travelling with Child Sketchbook - day 2."

'Congratulations! You're the proud father of three healthy, bouncing tax deductions!'

"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."

"Which one's yours?"

"With the baby-cam, there is no privacy."

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: This is solids?

"Which one's mine?"

'She just came down the stairs without walking.'

"It's a dependent!"

'He's more supportive after his nap.'

Kids really do make you view the world from a different perspective...I'm on the floor, behind the couch, under the bed...

"Anything interesting happen over the weekend, Frank?"

"I'm sure he wasn't that big when we went out

'Oh wonderful! All day I've been waiting for that burp!'

"The main skill you need in parenting, is the ability to surreptitiously eat chocolate."

Baby At The Entrance Of The Maze Of Life

"Listen up and listen up good, 'cause I'm only going to say this a million times."

'It's a screaming ladies part.'

The (literal) birth of Venus.

"I was thinking of joining a parenting class."

'Which one's yours?'

"Okay, I'll change your diaper, but you better not tell any of my patients."

Overprotective Father

New dad.

"I've decided not tot become a father until later on in my fatherhood."