Nervous Nellie Mugs

The Return of Guarded Optimism

A pet cage wrapped in chains make the other customers in the waiting room nervous,

"You ought to do what I do—have a few belts before you meet with the old man."

Idlewild.

Another form of performance anxiety.

'How can I stop biting my nails?' - 'Always wear shoes.'

'Ouch.' 'I'm practising to see the dentist.'

Try to ask for a raise.

'Stop worrying. You're a cow. People love cows.'

"Ignore the 45,000 people. They're watching you, but they're not staring at you."

"Ok, time to go in there and nail this interview."

"Is this your first job interview, sir?"

"Anxiety? No, nothing that I've noticed out of the ordinary."

Interview anxiety

Four Types of Test-Takers...

Worry tank

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

No Immediate Danger

"How sweet, your hand is trembling."

"You go out first. Signal me if it's safe!!"

'Let's try it once without the parachute.'

Nervous Student

"It's OK vicar, Nigel's just having one of his panic attacks."

"Ted doesn't test well."

"Can I put in a claim for interview trauma compensation?"

"I don't interview well."

"It's a simple procedure. You'll be fine – as long as no one gets sloppy."

"And, of course, if I were to get the job and start feeling comfortable here I'd no longer need the security blanket."

'Half-crazed with nerves Petey Otterloop awaits the start of the winter concert.'

"In a nutshell Mr. Beesley, you have hypochondria."

'Relax, folks, he just did that for me. When I get the hiccups, a little scare never fails to cure them.'

"You're being audited. Are you nervous?"

"I just remembered... I forgot to turn off the sink."

"I say this as a friend, Tom...we always know when you're bluffing!"

'Would you mind holding my hand Jim? The truth is, I'm deathly afraid of flying.'