Negotiation Newbie T-Shirts

"Apparently, we don't negotiate for a pay rise anymore. We have to put forward a case for not taking a pay cut."

'Please give me the strength to ask for a raise without my voice breaking into an annoying falsetto and my brow all sweaty.'

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

UK/US Free Trade Deal

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

'It's a deal, lets sniff bottoms!'

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."

"That's it lads, 364 days annual leave...what would we have done without our union!"

'You think I'm crazy; I think you're crazy...finally some common ground!'

'We're making progress. I just got a firm 'maybe'.'

'I ace 'wheeling' but I flunked 'dealing'' - Boy on leaving Business Administration.

'Try and be negative in a positive way.'

SALE

"What if he's bluffing? What if he's not? What if the room just gets too hot?"

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

'Pick a contract...any contract!'

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

'Gentlemen, I've been authorized to sweeten the offer.'

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

"I see we're going up against the Big Guys."

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

"Oh dear...I don't think negotiations are going too well..."