Negotiation Expert T-Shirts

'So, how much to remove this ugly old tree? $1750. It's not THAT ugly.'

'Now that I have your attention...'

'I demand a raise, and I have the muscle to back it up.'

'You help me with my homework and I'll help you with the timer on the video recorder!'

GOP mind trick

'That last meeting was a complete turn-off.'

Tsipras and Merkel

"Oh, I don't mind. I've negotiated three trips to the mall for each one of these."

"I'm getting tired of telling you you can't have a raise!"

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"

"That's it lads, 364 days annual leave...what would we have done without our union!"

"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."

'You think I'm crazy; I think you're crazy...finally some common ground!'

'We're making progress. I just got a firm 'maybe'.'

'I ace 'wheeling' but I flunked 'dealing'' - Boy on leaving Business Administration.

'Try and be negative in a positive way.'

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

'Pick a contract...any contract!'

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

'Gentlemen, I've been authorized to sweeten the offer.'

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

Changing Minds

'As my solicitor I think you could have negotiated that better.'

'How did the 'I want you all to take a pay cut or leave' strategy go down?'

'To close the deal, I had to make some minor concessions.'

'Maybe we should sign him before the MVP award is announced.'

"That's Hicks from the corporate office. He's adorable, but trust me—when it comes to acquisitions, he's an animal!"