Multitasking Genius T-Shirts

"The commute is rough today."

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

"Let me just check my email, my texts, my missed calls, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, my credit score, my horoscope, the results of this latest personality test, the S. & P., the Dow, the news, this article about cute dogs, and the weather, and then we can go."

"Drunk, yet orderly"

"Your resume says that you've got your Ph.D., your M.B.A. and that you've worked as a C.F.O. and C.E.O. but that your most important title and position has been M.O.M.?"

Believe it or not: Once upon a time Dads couldn't even boil water.

"Can I multi-task? As a single mom I'm both the bread-winner and bread-baker!"

Hassled Mother.

"I'm exempt from the company fitness program. I have triplets at home."

"Here comes the quote unquote dog whisperer."

"Slowly begin to reawaken the body with thoughts of unread E-mails, piles of dirty laundry, and the kids you have to pick up from school."

Magic coat fixing problems while walking the dog.

Studying and technology

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

"You wouldn't believe how many patients he sees in a single day!"

Merlin realizes too late that he shouldn't be hexing while driving.

"... with a side of brown rice, right. And can the delivery guy stop at the pharmacy and pick up my prescription?"

Working mother

"If anyone can balance a career with motherhood and state-sponsored terrorism, it's Jeannie."

Piano eight hands.

Exhausted mother holds up 'Off Duty' sign.

'I'm a very busy man - this way I am able to hunt and cook at the same time.'

"Hey Ma, Timmy's please..."

'Sorry, I can't talk now, Mr. Harris, I'm texting right now! I'll take whatever punishment you want to give me.'

One Man Band

"Singing cowboy AND notary public"

Multitasking.

Busy woman

'I can't help feeling we've forgotten something.'

Sorry, still got my 'raising kids' head on...

'I'll call you back. I'm sleepwalking!'

"Mia Farrow would find the time!"